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Paradise found. You are your own harshest critic.

Updated: Jun 4

Grouper Fish
MAORI WRASSE – THE FRIENDLIEST FISH ON THE REEF

Rules, expectations, opinions, comparisons, structure, attitude blah, blah, blah… Oh! How my head aches just thinking and reading these words.


When did my life become so rigid and predictable? When did I attract and start surrounding myself with dream stealers, sarcastic, fake and cynical, people with no self-esteem, whom in order to feel good themselves find fault with others? When did I become just like them?


They say you are your own harshest critic.


My world had become dark, very dark and I questioned myself daily. Then I read the following quote


“Watch your thoughts. They become words. Watch your words. They become deeds. Watch your deeds. They become habits. Watch your habits. They become character. Character is everything”.


I also remembered a TV ad when I was a kid. “The fish that John West rejects, is what makes John West the best!”


I had to make a choice. Not to run or escape but to rise above my misery and find my own clean air. I had to mature and become more accountable to myself.


Cheesy as it sounds I wrote a letter to my younger self. The message summary… “You have one life to live so ensure you live it with no regrets”.


I chose to mix it up, whist still doing what I love i.e. helping others, learning about money, travelling, personal and spiritual growth, outdoor sports, food and wine. More importantly I chose to act on my decision. And while I’m still a work in progress I many would say I now live in paradise i.e. Cairns


The career I love i.e. financial planning is already full of rules and expectations, so as an experiment I tried having no expectations in all other areas of my life. WOW!!!! Please try this experiment for yourself.


When I consciously placed no expectations on myself, by my surprise I did more, I enjoyed more, I became healthier, I needed less, I was authentically interested in others more and I became more grateful. Most importantly experiences became more valuable to me, than things.


Living with less expectations has made me happier and at the same time attracted other like-minded, generous and happy people into my world. Instead of darkness I am starting to see colour. I am more energised, more at peace and fulfilled.


Decide today to live life without expectations. Do it for your future self.


Here’s some Tips I apply in my own life

  • I choose to be grateful every day and throughout my day.

  • I act, on my choices and decisions. Motion begets more motion

  • I constantly seek new experiences and adventures.

  • I take my career seriously but not myself seriously.

  • If I have a negative opinion, I tell myself “It’s ok to have an opinion and not share it” and then I keep quiet.

  • The past is dry cement and I can’t change it, however I can define my future by the choices today.

  • I let go of what I can’t control and I focus on what I can.

  • When I am with others I am no place else.

  • I invest time in myself.


This post was written by Me, as such they are my personal views and not financial or general advice.


You should always seek independent financial advice when it comes to choices about your personal finances. This is one area of your life where it’s worth paying for it to be done right.

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